a little ramble

All I want is an equal love. I want to love & be loved back.
That seems impossible to find.

I'm in my house on a gloomy Sunday. A day full of cleaning.
I want to start a meditation schedule. I want to meditate every single day during the month of October.
Meditation seems to help cheer me up by raising my self love. I've struggled with self love for years now & it gets to be exhausting. I always thought of self love as being selfish, but now I know that you cannot depend on others to love you back. Sometimes it's okay to be selfish.

I have big dreams, but I just don't feel motivated. I really wish I could get out of this depressing rut.